I love my job, but I hate half the people I work with and the money is shit for what the job entails. Going to wait it out until September, see if the money improves then quit in a blaze of glory* *Get another job and quietly leave because I hate goodbyes.
What do you think is better; Living a happy lie, or coping with a sad truth?
Sad truth, every time. Living a happy lie isnt living at all. If its accepting a situation, the sooner you take that deep breath and deal with it the sooner you can move on with your life and be happy. And if it’s a person, if they’re lying to you, they’re showing you who they are. They’re showing that they dont respect you enough to tell you the truth, and you are better off not having people like that in your life.
I want to be more open with people but im afraid of getting laughed at which is also why i put myself down as a joke a lot, but thats still not good because by talking that way about myself it makes people believe the negative stuff im saying about myself and is a form of subconcious reinforcement from me that its okay for them to say that stuff about me too.
I also spent my final year of uni not really getting out of bed or talking to anyone or having any extensive verbal communication with anyone, so I can still express myself really well on paper but out loud i struggle. Im so busy concentrating on not doing the things other people do that annoy me i end up doing a whole bunch of other stuff that annoys me like not challenging problematic language, dumbing myself down as to not bore people, and generally sounding like a fucking bitchy asshole.
Im working on it.
My confidence around people is still not where it should be and it fucking sucks.
Sharing Mondays, apparently.